This past week has been tough, not necessarily for/because of Izzy and Joe, but more because we lost their great grandma, who I called “Nana” and they called Nana O.
Nana was 88. She had been living at Noni and Baba’s, and she had a stroke one week ago from today. That whole day she had had a great day, it just came out of nowhere. Not that she hadn’t been fighting health issues and some dementia, she had, but we weren’t expecting the stroke. She died 3 nights later in her sleep, after all my Aunts/Uncles had been able to be with her.
I know I posted a lot of updates around Izzy and Joe swimming in Uncle Paul’s pool, but that was one of the blessings of this pandemic. Nana got to watch Izzy and Joe more this summer than she might have in the next 5 summers combined if she had lived in Raleigh.
My last in person conversation with Nana was about a month ago, as I made a pit stop on my way to and from scuba diving. On the way there, she and I sat for 30 min in her room, I had to interrupt her on the phone with one of her friends bc it was late and I needed to get down, but we still sat and chatted. It was nice, she had a smile on her face the entire time. She may have asked what I was going to to tomorrow a few times, but who cares. She was wig-less too, which is something I appreciated, as she had gotten more comfortable in her own skin those last few months. Nana always wanted her hair to be proper, but we didn’t care. On the way back through I was in such a rush we didn’t talk much, she more or less watched me inhale a dinner, and then gave me a hug and told me how much she loved me and my family, which she did every time she saw me.She always did this with Nana’s smile, a distinct smile I think I will remember forever. The hello/goodbye hugs from Nana were something that everyone got, every time, no matter what.
My favorite memories of Nana were playing cards. If I’d crack a joke while we were playing, she’d have this sly smile or laugh while she looked at her hand, accompanied by a motion of her hand almost like she was hitting the air, or slapping the table. If I cut her trick, she smack my hand and ask – “now why would you do that to nana”. When I was learning to play bridge, something she taught me, one of the first times was with my Great Uncle Steve. We had made it very clear this was going to be a learning, non-serious game. I went to cut the cards on the first hand, and didn’t cut them towards the dealer. I was greeted with a very stern “Always cut the cards towards the dealer”, to which Nana responded “so much for a learning game” with a smile.
Yesterday was Nana’s funeral. We were supposed to go to Raleigh for it, but my entire family had a COVID exposure, so they told us it was postponed. Therefore, as coincidence would have it, we headed to where my wife’s family was spending the weekend – Holden Beach – Nana’s favorite place. By the time we found out they were still going to have the funeral, it was too late for us to get there, so we spent the day at Holden Beach and then watched the ceremony virtually. On the beach, Izzy and I went looking for shells, something Aunt Teresa would always do. I wanted to find Teresa a special shell on this day. If this wasn’t divine intervention, I don’t know what is, but after 5-10 min of looking, sitting in the middle of the waves, apart from all the other shells, was the biggest, perfectly intact conch shell I’ve ever found at Holden Beach. It was as if the ocean was giving it to us, similar to the scene in one of Izzy’s favorite movies – Moana. The kicker, I then decided to try to find one for myself, and.2 minutes later, found a different type, a spiral conch, my favorite, and the biggest one of those I’ve ever found there either. Then, just to put a cherry on it, I thought it would be nice to get one for Noni (my mom) so she didn’t feel left out, and found another perfect conch.
I then told Izzy as we were looking out at the waves that this was Nana O’s favorite place. Izzy capped the beach trip by telling me that “Jesus has Nana now”.
The funeral, albeit virtual, was a good one. Nana’s favorite priest said the mass, and my brother wrote some remarks. It was a shame that he couldn’t have been the one to say them, they were great remarks. Afterwards, we couldn’t watch live, but they put Nana in the columbarium beside Papa, or as Izzy would have called him, Papa O. We watched that on Youtube after Austin, our cousin, posted it. Aunt Teresa was able to put her in the columbarium, and Nana’s friends were there. She had missed her friends dearly during Covid, so it was fitting that they were the ones to see her off.
Death is a sad thing, but there is comfort in family, there is comfort in moments, and there is comfort in God. Nana gave me my faith, and we have no doubt she is where she was meant to be. We will miss you Nana, and I’m sorry that you didn’t get to teach Izzy and Joe crazy 8’s, O Hell, or Bridge, but you better practice, because one day, hopefully not for many years, we’re all going to play together.